Discovering Your Inner Joy

by Pastor Gina Johnson

Let us pick up with our wonderful story regarding Josiah. If you guys remember last time, this little 10-year-old boy is confused by the list on the fridge and he's thinking to himself, man, like he's 10 and why is this feeling heavy for him? And he decides to throw on a coat and sneak out to his favorite spot.

And his favorite spot happens to be at the end of the block where the street light has been burnt out for quite some time. And he goes to sit there and just be by himself. You know, maybe he is an old soul.

I've known some young kids that are old souls, but when he gets there, he sees this lantern and there is a glowing flame just sitting there, not too big, but calling him to it. And he sits down there and he's like, what is this? What are you doing here? And he feels the lantern say to him, hey, take me with you. And so he picks up the lantern and he takes it home with him, giving him hope.

And so now we continue. You know, Josiah didn't say much when he brought the lantern home. He sat it on his dresser right next to a small stack of books that he was always pretending to read before he went to bed.

He didn't take any time to go and ask his mom where it might have come from. He didn't even question himself what it meant. You know, Josiah didn't feel any need to announce anything.

Part of him was afraid that if he did, it might get taken away from him. And one thing he knew was this lantern belonged with him. There were times where he'd have to tuck it away out of fear that someone would see it and find it.

But most of the time he was able to keep it sitting on his nightstand right by his bed. Every once in a while he would look at it just long enough to feel a sense of peace cOhming from it. Just long enough to remind himself that sometimes when you're confused and you don't know what's going on, there's still a light that's calling you and guiding you.

And you know, maybe that's how some things begin. They begin in that quiet knowing that we found something along the way and it's going to guide us the rest of the way.

Over these past few weeks we've been taking the backwards journey, moving from the grown-up Jesus that we know and following through the moments that shaped him, that shaped his ministry, that brought us into knowing our Savior more. We stood by him at the shoreline where we were able to join him for breakfast. We sat at Levi's table.

We rested under the fig tree. We walked with him on the road to Galilee. Today we step back even further. We step back to where he's just 12 years old. This is a great moment of discovery that reveals something about Jesus, but it also reveals something about us.

Join me in Luke chapter 2 verses 41 through 52.

Every year Jesus's parents went to Jerusalem for the festival of the Passover. When he was 12 years old they went up to the festival according to custom.

After the festival was over, while his parents were returning home, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but they were unaware of it. Thinking he was in their company, they traveled on for a day. Then they began looking for him among their relatives and friends.

When they did not find him, they went back to Jerusalem to look for him. After three days they found him in the temple court, sitting among the teachers, listening to them, and asking them questions. Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and his answers.

When his parents saw him they were astonished. His mother said to him, son why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you. Why were you searching for me? He asked.

Didn't you know I had to be in my father's house? But they did not understand what he was saying to them. Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart, and Jesus grew in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and man.

So let me share with you all a story, and there is a chance that I've shared this story with you all before, but whenever I read this part of the scripture, it really hits me. It brings something back to life, and so just a little context. Jesus's family travels to Jerusalem every year for Passover.

This isn't something new. This is something that is done in custom and tradition year after year, and it's not just his family. It is everybody, you know.

So you're calling your friends and your relatives. It's like come on guys, road trip, and you know road trip usually causes us to be like yeah road trip, but you know this is quite the journey, and on top of that for what's about to happen, it really makes the journey even longer on the back end. But you know there's a lot of walking and talking, and I'm sure you know people pack snacks, and every now and then a kid probably ran off for a minute or two, and they're like come on. We're heading to Passover. Keep on walking.

But have you ever tried to keep track of your kids in the middle of a busy place? I remember one time my family and I, we were at the city market in Kansas City, and honestly I don't think we were there for anything, but just a day shopping, grabbing some food, you know doing the things that enthuse my kids and give them an opportunity to be out and about. Just kind of trying to meet everyone where they're at and enjoying ourselves, and we have this moment, and this is one of those where's where's Ohmi? Has anyone seen Ohmi? And there is this panic that starts to rise up, and of course what does a parent do? They start accusing their kids. Hey, where's your brother? Weren't you keeping an eye on your brother? What did you do with your brother?

But once I calmed down from that, it became this instant, okay, hey, you go check here, you go check there. We just keep going, and thankfully, long story short, is a clerk in one of the stores found Ohmi and returned him to us. But it was an awful feeling to think, what if someone has taken Ohmi? What if Ohmi has gotten hurt, and he doesn't know what to do? What if he's had some kind of an accident, and he's hiding somewhere embarrassed and scared?

We had no idea, and it was one of those moments where you cannot panic. You cannot lose yourself and get caught up in emotions, because you have to be grounded in order to find your child. I've shared with you guys another story where we sent our daughter Isabella to go play at a friend's house, and it wasn't as simple as that time with Ohmi at the city market, because we looked everywhere.

We went blocks this way and that way. We called friends. We knocked on doors.

We finally had to involve the police, and I was sitting out on our balcony, hanging my head over the metal rail and I was praying, and I was just in the space of like, come on, come on, where is my baby? All of a sudden, as I'm sitting there like that, I hear, hi mommy. Isabella? Yeah. When she couldn't find us, she went to a neighbor's house who we've never known, never met, but she was so curious because she always knew that neighbor had cats, and so throwing all the rules that she had up to the age of seven, she just threw them out the window and went to pet cats, and I'm crying, and I'm hugging Isabella, and I'm yelling to the police officer that she’s back here, and she's just like, I got to pet the cats.

That was awesome. So can you just imagine what Joseph and Mary were feeling? Your heart drops. Your soul takes a hiatus from your body, but then all of a sudden, when they reappear, it's a combination between, “I’m so glad you’re alright,” and “I'm going to kill you. Do not leave my side ever again.” But truly, it's that part where the peace returns to your body, and everything feels restored, but that wasn't the same for Joseph and Mary.

Joseph and Mary lived in that moment of wondering where Jesus was for three days, and all that time, he wasn't even lost. He wasn't hiding. He wasn't trying to be a rebellious child. He was discovering. He was stepping into more of the fullness of who he was.

See, what's happening in the temple with Jesus being in there isn't a sentimental moment, actually. It's rather disruptive. You have this 12-year-old boy sitting amongst trained teachers, okay? He's sitting there, and back in those days, that wasn’t the way things were supposed to be. Culture mattered. Age mattered. Lineage mattered.

You weren't just a 12-year-old boy that just walked in and said, hey, I'm going to ask questions. I'm going to listen to these teachings, and I'm going to tell you all some things. Children were to listen. Children were to go through their training. Children were to be guided in their development. They did not lead religious scholars in deep conversations, and this is why Luke tells us in that verse that the people, they were amazed.

They weren't wooed by Jesus and the way he went in there and just so charismatically gave them all a sermon. They were amazed because something was clearly rising up in him that didn't fit. It wasn't expected, and it wasn't anything like they'd ever seen before.

This is actually the first moment in the gospel where Jesus names his relationship to God in a more personal way. He says, my father's house, and that language wasn't imparted to him from some teaching from some elder. That came from the recognition that he was feeling within himself.

There was something aligning within Jesus. Haven't you had those moments where you recognize that something is calling you, that something is calling you that is far greater than the moment you're standing in? Those moments where you realize that the truth of who you are is far more than you'd ever allowed yourself to be up to that point, and this isn't about, oh, I had that when I was 12, or I remember as I turned into an adult I had that. No, these are moments that come throughout our entire life.

It's the moment where we've been seeking, and we've been listening, and we've been asking the curious questions, and so now something aligns in us, and we can no longer pretend we don't feel it. We can no longer just keep navigating through the day-to-day. It's time to step into the temple.

It's time to listen to the teachers, and it's time to become one, and that's what I see happening here in the story of Jesus. I mean, we're talking about Jesus as a 12-year-old, and in the Bible, we actually don't have a lot of story between the birth, between Herod wanting to have all of these infants annihilated, and where we are now. We don't know clearly from the Bible what the weeks or months or years had been like leading up to this point, and it makes me curious.

It makes me wonder, just like I'd wonder about any of you as you are coming into your moments of recognition and alignment, is what has been stirring all along? What were some of those little indicators that had been quietly forming within the boy Jesus that were leading him into the temple with this kind of clarity and this kind of authority? Who did he meet? Who influenced him? What did he possibly read, or what did he hear in the quiet stillness that said, come on, now is your time? And it's interesting, because so many times, you know, I've heard this story, and it paints Jesus with more of a rebellion, and it paints the franticness of Mary, but that's not the case here. This is Jesus recognizing who he is. It's not him coming in to just ask questions and just listen.

It's him recognizing he can no longer deny the truth of who he is and what he's come here to do, and I think that might be hard for some of you to wrap yourselves around, because we always plant ourselves with the 30-year-old Jesus who now is calling disciples and miracles and all of those things, but it's like, you know what? I tell everybody, I got my call to ministry around like 12 or 13, but the truth of the matter is, is now where I am, and I really look back, no, I had that call to being the fullness of who I am, to the highest embodiment of who I am in the I Am when I was just a child. From the moment of coming into this incarnation, the inner voice in you, the Spirit, the I Am is calling you to know who you are, is calling you to say, this is my father's house, and I know who I am.

Jesus didn't come to just question and listen. He came to teach. He came to share.

He came as the master teacher, as the world teacher, because that's who he is, and we are all invited into that same place from the moment we step into this human experience. We're invited to know our father's house that resides within us, where we can go and meet him and come into the fullest embodiment of who we are. Now, I know some of you are probably listening to me saying, that's a lot of guessing.

Well, I don't believe it is. I believe when we really take time to understand who God is and why we're in this experience, it opens doorways that help us really remember who we are, and as we continue to remember who we are, and we put that into actualization, when we put that into serving and loving and teaching and moving things forward, then we can help others to remember as well, and this is where the real ministry begins.

I want to go back to the story. You know, when Mary finally finds him, she's breathless, she's overwhelmed. Jesus doesn't apologize. He doesn't have to justify where he's been. He doesn't have to say sorry with this sorrowful head down, sorry mom, I messed up, and at first glance, this may feel very dismissive, and trust me, as a mom, as a friend, as a daughter, as an anything, as a person, being dismissed does not feel good, but that's not what Jesus was doing. Jesus was simply holding to his truth. When he says, didn't you know I had to be in my father's house? This is him speaking clarity and speaking life and hopefully making an impression on others.

You know, have you ever had one of those moments when something did click into place inside of you, and maybe it was because someone said, hey, you know what, you're really gifted at this. And in that moment, a door started to open in your mind, or perhaps someone handed you a responsibility that intimidated you. You're like, oh man, I don't want that, but they were sure it was for you, and so you brought yourself to rise to the occasion.

Or what about one of those times where you just had such a moment of clarity where you said, this is what I need to do here and now, and you did it. You know, we've all had those conversations where someone comes in and helps you to recognize and feel like you are more than you felt like you are in a long time, and you can actually think with confidence, this is who I am. This is my purpose here.

It doesn't go with all of the labels. It doesn't go with all of the expectations. It doesn't go with all of the, this is what it's supposed to look like. It goes with knowing in that moment that this is who you are.

The thing is, so many of us experience moments like these, but in the moment itself, let's just be real. We just take it as a compliment. We are thankful for the recognition. Oh, wow, this has been entrusted in my care. Oh, I'm doing great. I can keep going. But the truth is, we're still too rushed, too distracted, and we're simply unsure. What do I even do with that? Man, it could have been the greatest opportunity, the greatest compliment, the greatest new beginning, and we don't even know what to do with it.

So what do we do? We accept the compliment, and we go back to doing what we've been doing all along. Instead of recognizing that it wasn't a compliment, it wasn't just an inner voice saying, attagirl, Gina. It was even more than that.

It was an invitation. It was an invitation to become more fully who you are. When you recognize that invitation and you understand it, that is when you can genuinely start to make movement in the enfoldment.

Something shifts, and everything that we've been holding onto, everything that we've been carrying around and putting time into takes on a whole new meaning. You know, even when there's a missing child, even when you're standing in a place that no one actually thinks you belong in, even when you're having someone look at you and say, I hear who you're saying you are, I understand what you think you are, but I can't see it. You know, when you feel those things, but you can still stand there with confidence, with humility, and allow it just to settle in you that you're not here to prove anything.

You're simply here to remember who you are. You're simply here to stand tall in who God has called you to be, and that's simply who you've always been, and I'll tell you it's in that moment when you can stand as Jesus did in the temple, when you can stand in that confidence and at the same time have that reverent humility. It's those moments when joy appears.

Not excitement, not something momentary that's just going to fade away, but true joy. There's joy when we discover our identity. There's joy when we discover that what we have in Christ can never be taken from us, and there's even more joy when we embody it and put it into application.

You know, that's what Jesus experiences in the temple, a joy that is so real and so rooted because it's connected to his purpose. It's so connected to his purpose and the greater understanding that even his parents don't recognize it. And sometimes these things are going to arrive, and you're going to know it's real, and you're going to know it's time, and you're going to be ready to take that next step, and other people around you aren't going to have a clue what's going on.

They're not going to know why you were chosen. Why was that given to you? Are you sure about this? And other times they might look at you like you were just clear crazy. Oh, there they go again. But the thing about it is that's okay because some of the recognitions that you're going to experience in your life, actually a lot of them, when they're on that deeper level, are between you and God first. If you listen closely to this story today, Jesus wasn't wandering off.

Jesus didn't get lost and just stumble into the temple. He definitely wasn't trying to avoid his parents, nor was he being an irresponsible 12-year-old. He was responding to that inner pull, the call of the Spirit that makes us feel at home.

I believe at some moment in some time in our life, could have even just been yesterday, we've all had that invitation. We've all had that inner pull of the Spirit. We've all felt it.

Sometimes it's quiet, so we're able to ignore it. Other times it just keeps tugging at you. It's that place where your mind wakes up.

It's that conversation that you keep playing over and over again because finally you're feeling alive. You're understanding what all of this has led up to and now you're ready to see where it goes next. And when you feel this pull and you're ready to respond to it, you're ready to pause and listen and then step forward.

Be ready because not everyone's going to understand. But when you're responding to that pull, you're not just remembering who you are. You're embodying it and you're living it out for those around you to do the same.

This is how joy is found. When we can actually take the time to hear the Spirit's calling and return to the trueness of who we are. When we can take the time and be in the Word and be in church and continue to read and to study and to listen and to observe life around us as it's all come together to remind us of who we are.

When we can sit alone in stillness and quiet, whether it brings on tears, whether it brings on laughter, and just be there and know that I am so much more than what the world tries to tell me each and every day. I am a child of God. I am a master teacher. I am embodying the love of Christ that I am going to take out into the world and share everywhere. That is when you can experience joy.

Jesus followed that pull. Jesus followed that tugging. He followed it right into the temple and from that he experienced the true joy of who he is for us to experience the true joy of who we are in him. Let's go back to our Josiah.

So late one evening, Josiah turned to the lantern, and right before bed he looked at it and said, I'm not sure why I found you, but I know that you're something special. He didn't even understand the words he was saying and it was okay because he didn't need to. And though the flame still just glowed softly, Josiah felt a sense of joy.

He didn't need any explanations. He just knew that this was something inviting him into something new, into something special. And so he took the lantern and he pulled it closer to the edge of his nightstand and then rolled over and went to sleep.

You know, sometimes the most faithful thing we can do is simply keep the light close. Continue to believe that the next moments are going to reveal themselves exactly as they should. Continue to recognize that joy does not come from anything external, but it comes from that deeper light that's within.

And so as we continue in our journey, I invite you to stand confident in the temple, to stand bold in the recognition of who you are, and to feel the true sense of joy that not only comes with the season, but is deep within you and always there.

Please join me in prayer.

Our almighty Father God, we give you so much thanks for your word that continues to reveal and remind us who we are. God, we recognize that we've been blessed to have your Bible, to have the Holy Spirit, and still there's so much more of the picture that we don't have clearly. And so, God, we place ourselves in the trust of your care. We place ourselves in the trust of those who have gone on before you that we will continue to hear your call, that we will continue to feel the presence of your Spirit, that we will continue to embody and bring forth to others the love and grace of truth of who we are in Christ Jesus.

It's in the most beautiful name of Jesus we pray. Amen.