Behind the Veil: Journey from Hidden to Risen – part 4

What follows is a transcript of Pastor Gina’s message from our Sunday morning gathering. We share these messages on our blog for those who appreciate the opportunity to read the sermon again—whether for deeper reflection, personal study, or a quieter moment of prayer and introspection. As you read, we invite you to linger with the words, notice what resonates, and remain open to how God may be speaking to you through them.

by Pastor Gina

It's just very interesting as I look at things that have been going on over this past couple weeks as we are coming to this midpoint in the journey of Lent and as we're moving through the book of Esther along with Jesus's journey to the cross, we are at the part that has been with me through my entire life. It's the, we're all familiar with the, for such a time as this and I know that I've told this story many times, but I'm going to tell it again. And so the, you know, the song we first sung this morning, Here I Am Lord, was a song that spoke to me quite deeply when I was answering my call to ministry.

And so when I was ordained, I made sure we sung it at my ordination and when I was choosing the songs for this week, which was actually Virginia's job, but I got started going in it and so I chose a couple. And as I was looking through the hymnal and I saw this one, I was like, gosh, you know, we do that one often. But I was like, no, this is so fitting because it's always been the song that said to me, you know, if you know who God is, just like the second song we sung, and you trust in God, then God will guide you.

And so it's saying, here I am, Lord, you know, use me and take me where you will, lead me where you will. And that's what we hear in our story today. And so I was in Warrensburg and I knew that I was going to have to make a decision if I was going to stay there.

I'm sorry, I was in Sedalia and I knew I was going to have to make a decision if I was going to stay there or if I was going to look for a church someplace else. And over time, things just fell into place that had me in connection with Warrensburg. And as much as that was something that was speaking to me, I knew that Warrensburg was not in the greatest place in the way of finances and attendance and there was a lot of revitalization that was needed there.

And I went to seminary with the call in my heart that I felt without a doubt was from God saying, I want you to go out and shepherd my people into revitalization, into awakening. And so I pursued missional church and church revitalization as the core of my degree focus. It was the core of my heart's focus.

And so that's what I did. And some things happened where it was just very fitting that I would step into a possible interview with the Warrensburg church and I was still hesitant. And so I was making my way through a normal day at the church and we were having a cluster meeting and I sat in a room surrounded by other ministers and Kirby Gould, who you all are very familiar with, she came to be a speaker at our cluster that day.

And as I was listening to everyone just giving their kind of check-in, we'd say, hey, what's going on in your congregation? How are you doing? How your congregation is doing? It was moving around. And one of the gentlemen who was there, his name was Paul and he was a minister in somewhere near Kansas, Harrisonville. He was a minister there.

And he said to me, he said, well, Gina, he's like, you're all set pretty much. He's like, so what about you? What are you going to do? You're going to be done in this upcoming fall. You know, where are you heading? What are you going to do? And I said, you know, I don't really know.

I'm just going to trust that the Lord will guide me in this process. And I tell you, right as I said that, that verse came to my mind. It just, I say it was spoken to me.

No, I didn't hear it audibly, but I did. I heard it within me. And that was even stronger than someone saying it for such a time as this.

And so I had no idea really what that meant because what I left out was as I began speaking to Warrensburg, there was a hard stop put in that said, no, you need to stay in Sedalia. And this wasn't from me. This was from our regional minister at the time.

And so Warrensburg wasn't even a question in my mind. My own senior pastor said, you're way too green for them. You don't have the experience.

They wouldn't want you. So you really shouldn't go there. And I said, okay.

So between his voice and the regional minister, I was done. Well, I walked out of that meeting that afternoon, said goodbye to my colleagues. And I was wondering what was that? What was that for such a time as this in my mind? And then I received a text message on my phone and it was a text message from the regional minister telling me that she has resigned and that she has really valued my friendship and walking alongside of me and that she wanted to let me know before the news got out.

And so I went and I told the senior minister and we had some conversation around that. And I was getting frustrated because right away he was asking me, well, you know what that means? That opens the door. If you want to pursue Warrensburg, you can pursue Warrensburg, which was a total change in his tune.

But as he said that, I felt it again. I was like, is that what that was about? That voice I heard earlier? And I had no idea. So later on that day, I went and I picked up my daughter, Gina, and we were at the Walmart parking lot.

And I was just sharing with her how I feel that something may be happening, something may be changing. And I told her, you know, I think I'm going to get led to Warrensburg. And she started telling me that, you know, I don't want to move, mommy.

But I know that whenever the Holy Spirit tells you to do something, that you always listen and you go. And that would be the second time then that it just came clear as day for such a time as this. So the day continues on as normal.

And I go to sleep that night. And I think I was sleeping fine. You know, people always ask me, how'd you sleep? Good, I was sleeping, you know.

But for some reason, I woke up and I would assume it was the middle of the night. And I woke up and I was sitting up in bed and Travis was laying there. And, you know, I'm like, Travis, and I'm crying.

And I tell him, I'm like, you know, I'm like, I got to tell you about this. And I think I'm supposed to go. I think I'm supposed to go to Warrensburg.

And he says, well, I've been wanting to tell you, I think you need to go and talk to Chad because I think that's what you should do too. And right in that moment, as I heard the voice again, I threw myself back on the pillow with tears in my eyes. I said, for such a time as this.

And I was just bawling like a baby. And he reaches over. He knows not to comfort me when I'm crying.

He just reaches over and comforts me a little bit. And there's that story. And it may seem funny to say that, but, you know, over this past week, two weeks, as we've lost, as we've had a couple dear members transition on, and as I was just considering the people who are here in our congregation and things, you know, I thought to myself, this is not a time to be scared.

This is not a time to panic or be afraid. This is a time to remember who we are. This is a time.

And, you know, it might sound funny, but I don't need just who we are as First Christian Church. That's who we are united, but who we are together, who we are individually, who we are as God's children. So I don't know what things hold in the future, but I know what things hold right here and right now.

And I am here right now for such a time as this. And you are sitting here with me for such a time as this. And we are going to continue to lock arms, not only in this church, but in our private lives, in our community, and so on for such a time as this.

And when we really embrace that, then we get to experience resurrection. Then we get to experience what it's like to be queens and kings in our life and in our destiny of what we're here and what we're doing. You see, it's nothing that we have to strive for or look for.

It's what's already here. We just need to clear everything out, like I say, and recognize that this is who we are. And I have those moments too where it's like, are you sure? Are you sure? And it's like, yeah.

You know, for such a time as First Christian Church, this is the time to really ask God, God, what can we do next? Where are you leading us? Help us see what is the next step, not just as a church, but individually as well. Where would you like to send me? If you send me, Lord, I will go for such a time as this. And so let's go ahead and jump into our story.

So as we went through the first three weeks, we had the hidden preparation. And there we had Esther who went into that time of preparing, and then thankfully she was chosen as the queen, although she did not know why. And we had Jesus who was baptized and sent into the wilderness.

And then in week two, we had our refusal to bow, where Mordecai knew where his loyalty and his allegiance lied. And it wasn't in man, it was with God. So he refused to bow to Haman.

And Christ, as he was in the wilderness, fasting and praying with questions, I'm sure, but stillness and silence, he refused to bow to the world. He refused to bow to Satan's temptation. And from that, we have a plot that is formed.

We have Haman who goes and bends the king's ear and says, I know how to fix this. There's a lot of people out there that aren't respecting you, king, and you're so great and you're so awesome. Give me your ring and I'll go out there and I'll make sure that all of those who are against you are taken care of.

And the king gives him his ring. And then there's the religious leaders who say, hey, that Jesus guy, this is getting out of hand. We need to do something because people are paying way more attention to him.

They're not honoring our traditions. They're not honoring what we know from our God. They're not honoring our king, our Caesar.

We have a Jesus problem. And then I think I told you all, I had a little story for you to stick a pin in. If you remember, it was nothing that was made a big deal out of, but Mordecai saved the king's life.

And because it was never made a big deal, it was just written in the annals. It was recorded in the annals, but nothing was done to thank Mordecai or to show him gratitude, yet he saved the king's life. And so now we continue.

Last week we were left with a choice as to what are we going to do with tension? Because there was a lot of tension going on. And not just the tension in the stories we were reading, but in the tension in our lives. Are we going to give up? Are we going to let fear take over? Are we going to trust and know that death doesn't have the final word? Both Esther and Jesus are positioned for such a time as this.

And so let us jump into the story in the book of Esther chapter four, beginning in verse one. When Mordecai learned of all that had been done, he tore his clothes and put sackcloth and ashes and went out into the city wailing loudly and bitterly. But he went only as far as the king's gate because no one clothed in sackcloth was allowed to enter it.

And in every province to which the edict and order of the king came, there was great mourning among the Jews with fasting, weeping, and wailing. Many lay in sackcloth and ashes. When Esther's maids and eunuchs came and told her about Mordecai, she was in great distress.

She sent clothes for him to put on instead of sackcloth, but he would not accept them. Then Esther summoned Hatak, one of the king's eunuchs, assigned to her and ordered him to find out what was troubling Mordecai and why. So Hatak went out to Mordecai in the open square of the city in front of the king's gate.

Mordecai told him everything that had happened to him, including the exact amount of money Haman had promised to pay into the royal treasury for the destruction of the Jews. He also gave him a copy of the text of the edict for their annihilation, which had been published in Susa, to show to Esther and explain it to her. And he told him to urge her to go into the king's presence to beg for mercy and plead with him for her people.

Hatak went back and reported to Esther what Mordecai had said. Then she instructed him to say to Mordecai, all the king's officials and the people of the royal provinces know that for any man or woman who approaches the king in the inner court without being summoned by the king has but one law, that he be put to death. The only exception to this is for the king to extend the gold scepter to him and spare his life, but 30 days have passed since I was called to go to the king.

When Esther's words were reported to Mordecai, he sent back this answer. Do not think that because you are in the king's house, you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish.

And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this. Then Esther sent this reply to Mordecai, go gather together all the Jews Har and Susa and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days and nights or day.

I and my maids will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.

So Mordecai went away and carried out all Esther's instructions. And that concludes the reading of the word. And so these words, they have echoed throughout centuries.

The words where he says, who knows, but you have come to your royal position for such a time as this. And Esther becomes courageous, but before she becomes courageous, something very human happens. She hesitates.

You see, Esther hears what is happening and she learns about the decree and she understands that this is dangerous for all of her people. But Mordecai comes back to her and says, you must go to the king. She answers though, you know, if I go to the king, I could be killed.

That's not being cowardly. That's just reality. If I do this, do you understand the ramifications that'll happen on the backend? The law in the palace is clear.

Nobody gets to come to the king. And guess what? Guess what their uncle, he hasn't called me in a month. He hasn't even asked to see me.

And now you want me to go and see him without an invitation. You know, Esther hasn't been summoned. She's doing what we all do when we have the hesitation and we start to explain all the risks.

Instead of looking at what could be the fruit that comes, we start to look at everything that could go wrong. We start to find more and more reasons and ideas of separation to put a space between us and what is truth. And so there's this problem in our same lives.

You know, in the moment that we see something that needs to be done or said, and we're calculating the cost, what do we do? We avoid the conversation. We feel the step. We feel the nudge to take the step and we avoid it.

The courage that it would take to speak up, it would be a lot easier to just remain quiet. And sometimes this happens when we're at work. Sometimes this happens when in our families, because things feel risky and we're all getting along so well, this is the last thing we want to do.

Sometimes it happens in our own faith. You know, one thing that I recognize as I got to be in ministry more and more and working with people of a more seasoned generation, it was amazing how many people that I talked to that were older than 65 who had told me their faith was always what it was because that's what they were told it was. And that's where they got their understanding.

And so they attended church their whole lives. They went to Sunday school, they paid their tithes and had their pins, and they stepped into different roles of leadership. And they're going to sit there until their doors close because they are faithful, they're part of a community, they're instrumental in the body of the church.

But then somewhere in the later part of their life they realize that, but what did I actually build this on? What does this actually mean to me besides remembering what my parents taught me? Besides remembering the things I practice? And so it's interesting because as I talk to different people throughout the time that I've been a pastor, I've had people come to me who are in their 70s and start asking questions very similar that I used to hear with people in youth group because they finally felt permission. They finally felt that nudge to say, is this what I believe? And what exactly do I believe? And why? Why would I continue to stand here? Or why would I continue to stop to be silent? Or why would I take the step to speak up? It's really interesting what happens because fear creeps in and it always says, what if something goes wrong? You know, have you ever thought about, I don't know how you all learned how to swim. I never took swimming lessons or anything like that.

But you know, when I watch different young people learning to swim, when I've been at the pool and I've seen a parent standing off to the side working with their kids, you know, they're at the edge of the pool. And I've seen parents saying, come on, come on. Or they're holding on to the wall and they're just working on kicking or they're holding it and they don't want to let go.

And I was one of those kids at times. And it's interesting because they've listened to the instructions. They've been doing all the things that they're supposed to be doing, but now it's time for them to jump off that edge in by themselves and just take a little swim.

And there is lifeguards and there's a swim instructor and their parents are sitting there watching too. And they're still looking like, but what if? What if I drown? What if I hit my head? What if I jump too hard and stub my foot? What if no one helps me while there's a room full of people around them? You know, you can explain swimming all day long, but eventually there is a moment where you have to jump in. And almost everyone hesitates at that moment.

Not because they don't want to swim, but because they want to be sure that everything is going to be okay. Esther is standing at the edge of the pool and she has to evaluate the risk and she knows the stakes. She knows things now, but if we're honest, we've all been there.

We've all been at some form of a transition or a change in our life. And we're wondering, am I really ready for what's next? Do I really have what it takes to do this? And sometimes we will rehearse the worst outcomes in our mind over and over and over again and we'll add a little different change each time. Here's fear number one.

Here's fear number one B. Here's fear number one C. And it's ridiculous because there's still fear two, three, and four out there, but we're just getting so creative. It's the power of the mind. Well, you know, this is when the turning point happens because Mordecai, he says to Esther, he says, hey, hey, don't think just because you're the queen that you're going to be safe.

Don't think because you have some kind of false authority, because it is false, because the king doesn't even know who she is. The king doesn't even know that this is her people that he just stamped with the seal of annihilation. And so he says, do not think that because you're in the king's house that you alone will escape.

And you know, the funny thing is if you really think about that, say Esther didn't get persecuted. Say all the Jews were annihilated but her. Would she have really escaped that persecution living the rest of her life knowing she could have done something different and didn't? So in other words, you know, this moment isn't as random as we think it is, you know, and I know that we've had experiences and times in our lives where we've been preparing and preparing and we just were hesitant, but someone comes in and says, hey, this is what you've been working towards.

This is what you've been building. It is now time to trust and to execute. Instead of saying, what if this goes wrong? What about saying to yourself, what if this is exactly why I'm here? What if this situation, what if this loss, what if this transition, what if this opportunity, although it looks scary, is exactly why I'm here? To build the bridge, to fill in the gaps, to remove the illusion of this chasm of separation and stand confidently in who we are, who we are in Christ.

You know, there is a moment that echoes this in Jesus' journey. In the Gospel of Luke, it's something very similar where he pauses for a moment and Jesus sets his face towards Jerusalem. That's the line.

Jesus set his face towards Jerusalem. And that might sound like a very simple sentence, but it too is the turning point that parallels the story of Esther, because up until that moment, Jesus is traveling. He's traveling through towns and villages, and he's teaching, he's healing the sick, he's gathering followers.

There's tons of crowds or people around him. He can hardly get rest. He has to sneak off to himself or with selected few just to reset himself.

But now he's going to Jerusalem, and Jerusalem is different because people are hopeful that he is their king and their messiah. And on the other side of the coin, people are afraid. People are ready for something to be done with Jesus.

People are questioning him and questioning him in hopes of finding how can we trip him up? How can we cause him to fall in his own walk, in his own speech, so he takes himself out? Jerusalem is where power lives. Jerusalem is where the religious authorities were plotting and planning already uneasy, setting every booby trap waiting to catch Jesus. But what does Jesus do? In the face of tension, he sets his face towards Jerusalem and says, for such a time as this, it's time for him to go.

Jesus knows it. And the disciples don't understand it. They don't understand, okay, he knows people are after him.

Why is he going towards it? They're still imagining some kind of triumph, and they aren't seeing it. So now they're like, okay, if we're going to Jerusalem, then something great is going to come together when we get there. But Jesus knows that the road to Jerusalem is actually going to lead to someplace very challenging, someplace very difficult, but someplace where he has been led all along.

He's not circling around. He's not trying to figure out what to do. He's not beating around the bush.

He begins walking to the very place that would cost him the most, yet give us everything. Give us absolutely everything. And you know, sometimes when I think about those words, it's not even so much that he's giving us anything as much as he's reminding us what we've always had.

Because more than Jesus is our savior, Jesus is our brother. Jesus is God's heir, just as we are. Jesus is the son of God, just as we are the sons and daughters of God.

See, we have this misconception at times that sometimes when something's about to happen, there has to be all this drama to it. There has to be, but it doesn't. Sometimes the greatest changes, the greatest transitions, the greatest opportunity for transformation to be revealed is in the quiet stillness.

A lot of us aren't standing in the same place as Esther in any way, but if we look, we can find the correlation. No one's expecting us to come in and be the new king and queen, to be the messiah, to turn everything around. But we have places where expectations are being asked of us, where people around us are looking to us for strength and direction and guidance.

But we all know that the greatest expectations on us come from ourselves. And yeah, you know, they kind of do come from within, but that's just because they're blocking the truth that's within. I sat here the other day and was in a meditation space, and you guys know how much I talk, right? So now just imagine me trying to be silent.

That's a feat. And as I sat here, I got to that space, and I don't know how long it took me. I have no idea.

But I had to shed, shed. Gina, your finances. Gina, your children.

Gina, your church. Gina, your marriage. Gina, what do people think when they see you? Gina, what about you and your parents? I had to get rid of all that, you know? And it's funny because that was actually layer number two.

The layer first was when I had to get rid of all the stories and things that I think everyone else is saying, because those ones were just what Gina was saying. So it's amazing to get silent how much I had to clear through. But once I did, once I did, you know what stopped? My tears stopped.

My shakiness stopped. My wanting to get up off of here and walk back out there stopped. Because once I shed all the noise, once I shed all these false illusions of what I think people think and want from me and who I think I am, I was able to rise up and say, this is what it's like to remember who I am.

This is what it's like to be in the stillness. This is what it's like to embrace for such a time as this. It's not that I'm some great prophet.

I'm not no, you know, I'm just Gina. But in that moment when I quieted all the noise and I allowed myself just to be present to who God sees me as, man, everything shifted. And that's what it was for Esther.

You see, Esther doesn't suddenly become fearless. Esther becomes faithful. And she gathers her people and she gathers her strength and she says, everybody, let's fast.

Let's pray. Let's do this together and let's make it happen. And she says, and if I perish, I perish.

Because she recognizes that courage is trusting God. Courage is trusting in the example and the teachings and the promises that Christ Jesus put before us. Courage is being faithful even when fear is on all sides.

The thing is, it doesn't even stop with the decision that Esther made there because she made that decision to step forward and she went into prayer and fasting. Guess what, guys? She still hasn't even gone to see the King. So there's this, okay, standing up to my uncle, wait, no, uncle put me in my place.

And then she says, all right, everybody, we're going to do this. And if anything happens, it's okay. We're just going to do this.

And so she goes and she fasts and prays for three days. And then the text tells us she puts on her royal robes and she walks to the inner court of the palace. Now, just imagine with me for a moment, the palace is quiet.

The guards are standing there. The laws have not changed. And the fact that they haven't seen Esther in over a month, just imagine what's going through their minds as she not only steps there, she steps there fully adorned, crowned, and all.

And anyone who approaches the King will be killed if the King so chooses to do that. And Esther knows this. But in that moment, fear disappears.

Courage tells her to take the step anyway. She hears the words of her uncle echoing in her mind. She walks into the inner court and she stands there and the King sees her.

I bet she's holding her breath in that moment. I bet inside she's shaking just like I was when I was going to sing that song. What if something goes wrong? This isn't just stumbling on a note.

This is my life. And she stands there and this is where we read, when he saw Queen Esther standing in the court, he was pleased with her and he held out to her the gold scepter that was in her hand. He was pleased with her and he held out to her the gold scepter that was in her hand.

Do you know what this is? This is the moment of invitation. And if we know ourselves, we've all had a moment of genuine invitation, a time where someone has said to you, come closer. Do not be afraid.

How often have you allowed that voice to be the voice within you? How often have you allowed that voice to be the voice of God saying, come closer? Do not be afraid. It doesn't matter how many doctor's appointments you have. It doesn't matter how old you are.

It doesn't matter how many friends you have. It doesn't matter what you look like. It doesn't matter your level of education.

It doesn't matter if these pews are filled or not. Come closer. When you hear that, something shifts inside of you.

And when you hear it instead of from the world, you hear it from within, it's amazing. That's when the real invitation has been received. And you know, this rarely happens in isolation.

A lot of times we have to be willing to show up. We have to be willing to trust and accept before we receive that invitation. And that's exactly what Esther did.

She trusted, she remembered who she was, who she is, and why she was placed there. She fasted and she prayed and she gathered her strength and she went for it. And that's what true faith looks like.

When Esther stepped in, it wasn't just come closer. It was, what is it you ask? You can have up to half of my kingdom. So Esther was afraid and the king smiles and says, what can I give you? Half of my kingdom.

It's unheard of. And you know, when we step forward to God and say, here I am, Lord, is it I, Lord? And we go with that excitement and that trust, then he's going to say even better than half my kingdom. He's going to say, welcome.

Welcome home. Welcome to what I prepared for you. Welcome to what I formed in you.

Welcome to the moment that I already saw coming. And it's in those moments where we can breathe, where we can confidently raise our heads and smile because we know. I know who I am and I know what I must do.

And if you can find that moment and trust, well then, for such a time as this.

Please pray with me. Our most gracious and loving God, what can we say, Lord, besides thank you? Thank you for the example that you set before us in Christ Jesus. Thank you for the Holy Spirit, the comforter, the advocate, the wise counselor that walks beside us.

Thank you for who we are because of who you are. And so as we go from this place today, God, may we all find that place beyond the noise, beyond the labels, beyond the fear, beyond the doubt, where we can hear your voice say, come closer. Welcome home.

God, we love you and we thank you and we trust that you will lead us forth in every moment for such a time as this. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.