Mother Knows Best

by Pastor Gina Johnson

You know Mother's Day is not just about flowers and cards and making sure we take mom out to lunch, but it's an opportunity to understand the deep spiritual role of motherhood, not just biologically, not just through titles, but in the essence of what it means to have a mother's spirit, what it means to have a mother in our life.

Now, as you all know, I am a mother. I've been mothered and I am constantly mothering because I still have children, whether they're at home or not at home, you all know it doesn't end just because they move on out. And one of the things that I've come to know in being a mom is that it is a gift. It is a lesson. It can be empowering some days. It can be discouraging some days. You can pat yourself on the back and feel like you are the best mother ever and then other days you feel like, “Man am I ever gonna get it right?” And some of that we could say is due to the way that we were mothered, is due to the experiences that we had or didn't have, the mothers we watched on tv or the mothers we saw when we went to our friends houses.

See, I didn't have that kind of a mom. I had that kind of a dad where everyone wanted to call my dad, dad, but how many of you all had that mother, the kind that your friends just loved and they came over and they treated her just like she was their mom and they made themselves right at home.

You see, being a mother is not just some identity that you're given because you give birth. It's a gift. It's a gift of essence and presence. It's a gift of compassion and love. It's an honor and, yes, there are situations in the world where that may not feel true. I had a mentor who was very adamant with me to be careful when you preach a Mother’s Day or Father’s Day message because not everyone has had a good experience, and, you know, I was that person. I was that person who put women in a particular box, especially mothers because of the relationship I had with my mother. And it was only through the church and through the gift of Travis's mother where I really started to experience love that measured up to what I thought a mother's love should be.

It was only through women in the church of a variety of ages who took me under their wing. Yes, I was their minister, but they saw a daughter. They saw someone that they were willing to love and pour into and nurture on a path. Have you all had women like that in your life, not just your mother, but someone, whether it was at school or perhaps at a job or maybe even in the church? I bet some of you ladies know of children who've grown up in your church and you love them just like they were your own.

Mother is such a sacred title where sometimes people feel dishonor in labeling that on anyone but their awesome and wonderful mother, but it's okay. Because more than “mother is a title” as I said, it's a force. It's a spirit. It's an essence and it's beautiful. So, this isn't a message about all the good mothers for all of those who've had good moms, this is a message about what it means to carry that energy of being a mother, of being compassionate, because mothers, what they do is they look after one another. They're divine caretakers. What they do is bring hope. They grow love in places where love may be lying dormant or non-existent and mothers are the ones that remind us of our potential, of the possibilities that lie before us. They show up in many forms in many places, but they are such a glue in our experience, in our life and the way things move. So, I want to take some time today to share with you some different mothers that have made an impression not only on this world, but on our lives. And I'm hoping that in this time you will feel that presence of a divine mother within you and remember the divine mother that has brought you to where you are today.

First we have Mother Teresa. Now, if you all know anything about Mother Teresa, she did not have any children. She was never married. As a matter of fact, it was the world that labeled her Mother Teresa, and what a beautiful label to give her because she was a nurturing spirit. She was a woman of action. She was a woman of power. Most of all, she was a woman of love and compassion, and she would remind us that one of the greatest ways to show love, to demonstrate love, is to do it quietly, to do it out of the limelight, to do it in places that might be a little uncomfortable, but they're still powerful and they're still meaningful.

Mother Teresa was the one that would spend time with those in hospital beds, with those on the side of the road, with those laying in the street sometimes in loneliness, sometimes in drunken stupor, sometimes in illness, but she very much like Jesus. She didn't have boundaries, not those kind of boundaries, not the ones that said, “You don't look like what a child of God should look like, so you don't deserve help,” and “You don't deserve a mother.” No, she went beyond that. She recognized that “I don't need to be in a spotlight, at a pulpit on a stage. I don't need to have lots of money and homes and other material things in order to be the presence of love and holiness.”

The lesson that we learn from Mother Teresa is that spiritual motherhood shows up when we practice presence, when we practice unconditional care, when we practice unmaterialistic devotion, when we practice unending nurturing love. So, my question for you as you think about Mother Teresa, as you think about our call in lives as Christians, is where in your life are you being called to show up? Not for credit. Not for materialism. Not for success or status, but just to show up for love. Where are you being called as Mother Teresa was called many times? And are you going to answer?

The second mother that I like to bring up some of you may not be as familiar with, but her name is mother Gothel. And mother Gothel comes from the story of Rapunzel. She captured Rapunzel as a baby and kept Rapunzel because of the power of her wonderful, gorgeous hair. And it's so funny because mother Gothel would always say that famous line, “mother knows best.” Mother knows best.

I think in that case we ask, “Or does she?” But here is the thing, we shouldn’t be so quick that we should discard her because of the way she was. Yes, she was controlling. Yes, she had a manipulative, deceptive form of love towards the stolen child that she raised as her own, but the thing is, if we're honest, how many of us have that overprotective mothering nature in us? How many of us have locked something away, have tried to shelter someone we care for, have tried to hold back someone from an opportunity because we thought, “No, that's not safe. No you shouldn't do that. Oh, what am I going to lose if I share that?”

You know, all the time you hear different stories in the land of celebrities of child celebrities and how later down the road there is all this arguing and fighting around money because their child became famous and they finally reached the age where mommy or daddy couldn't interfere anymore. Well how many of us have raised our children, have tried to control our friends, have tried to put ownership around our spouses and our loved ones, that very much was overprotective and we did it from a space of love? But, really, I think we did it from a space of fear.

That mother Gothel voice will rise up in us and we will take actions that we believe are protecting, but they end up being limiting. We'll take actions that we believe are looking out for our loved ones, for our children, for our family, but all we're actually doing is keeping them from living life, from experiencing that thing that might make them grow, from experiencing that fall that will help them to get up even stronger, and it's even worse if we're only doing it for our own selfish motives.

So, yes, mother Gothel. She's given a face and a personality to scare you and if I was Rapunzel I would run up to my tower and lock myself away, but the truth is there's a little Gothel in all of us. There's a little Gothel who wants to over protect, who wants to limit, who wants to shut down the opportunities and only point to the places where everything is safe and secure and already known. Well, guess what. We don't grow that way.

Again, bringing it back to Jesus, did he go and hide away? Yeah, for prayer, for refreshment, for rejuvenation, to commune with the Lord, to embody the Spirit, and then he came right back into the marketplace. He may have went to the mountaintop. He may have went to the cave, but he came right back. Can we do that? Can we recognize that wherever within ourselves we have been limiting ourselves, being over protective of ourselves, can we let it loose just a little bit and stop trying to close us in, stop trying to hold us back?

And even more so if there's someone in your life that you see that you are that influence on them, instead of the, “Hey, I'll help you get back up if you fall. Hey, I'll be here if you need anything,” are you the one saying, “You know, you don't know how that would go. I think you tried that before and you failed. I wouldn't do that again. What makes you think you'll be able to do that? Why don't you stay right there where you're safe?”

Can we bring forth the right voice because love doesn't teach possession, love releases, love receives, and love returns. It doesn't trap people in a place, but it allows them to be free and it helps them to shine. It's not the basket being put over their light. So, the question for you today is, is there a part of you, whether it's towards others or towards yourself, that you are mothering with fear instead of faith, that you are mothering by listing all the consequences instead of listing the beautiful possibilities?

Our next mother is mother goose. Now you might be thinking, “Man, mother goose? Mother goose? That's not really spiritual or biblical. Why would you include her, Gina?” I'll tell you why. Mother goose, I would say for most people and even some younger kids who maybe didn't hear her the same way some of us heard her, mother goose is a reminder of our childhood. Mother goose is a reminder of one of the greatest gifts that comes and that is the imagination.

Mother goose reminds us that we don't grow old and grow out of things, but instead we have something that we can take with us and carry with us as we grow. That's why these stories of mother goose come at such an early age and then we hear them repeated throughout life and I bet, if you look closely at all of the different tales and fables and stories out there, you can even find how these silly rhymes, these silly little analogies, these silly little stories actually teach us lessons of life and love and truth. And I bet if you look close enough, you'll find that biblical foundation because that biblical foundation is built on love.

You know, mother goose's rhymes weren't just silly, they were a means to teach us how to survive in the day and world that we're in, whether you heard them 50, 60, 80 years ago or whether you heard them 10, 20, 30 years ago, they were lessons on how to be kind, on how to navigate, on how to catch the little things in between the lines that we might not see. Maybe this evening everyone should go online or open up a book and check out an old mother goose story because a spiritual mother isn't just about wisdom, a spiritual mother is about playing, innocence, imagination, laughter, and song. When you have a mother goose within you and within your life you have that encouragement to hold that beautiful innocence.

And when we bring it back to Jesus, he said, “Let the children come unto me.” So, I invite all of you to tap into that mother that is within you. The question is, is are you allowing the mother goose in your life to make you feel safe enough to exhibit the soul of a child? Have you made space for joy and wonder and laughter and creativity? God has given you all these wonderful gifts. Are you allowing that mother goose playfulness to come out and be shown in this world?

Last but not least, the holy mother, our Mother Mary. The reason I really like Mother Mary is because she reminds me of the mother that always says, “Yes.” She didn’t even know what she was getting into but she said yes. She was a child at the time, if we really stop and think about it, yet she was the divine mother. She was a girl going through adolescence, puberty, and all those things, yet she was a divine mother. And she is so much more than just the Virgin  Mary.

She is equated to be the Sophia, which is wisdom. She is the great womb that birthed our savior. She is the one who said yes without fear, but rather with love and devotion. She teaches us as a mother what it means to trust not from what we see outside of us, not from what we're expecting to happen, not from all the stories and the scriptures that we studied, but to trust from the voice within, to trust from that divine mother, that divine feminine spirit that is within us, nurturing us and guiding us, and allowing us to step up and to step into our call fully. She didn't have a mother standing over her saying, “Yes, Mary, you should do this,” or a father saying, “That's my girl! Go get him!”

No, instead she had an angel and she had that inner peace, that inner voice, that inner Jesus saying, “Step forward into the mystery. You may not know what it holds. You may not know whether it's going to be easy or hard. You may not even know where this path is taking you, but you can trust that this path is taking you exactly to where you need to be, a place that is divine, a place that is whole, a place that is surrounded and filled with love and perfection.” The Holy Mother, our Divine Mary, teaches us to surrender, teaches us that when you surrender it's not about being passive. As she said yes to God, she knew that she needed the courage to carry out the mission that was before her.

So, when you think of Mary don't just picture the trembling girl who suddenly was visited by an angel. Don't picture the mother sitting at the cross next to the disciple John, filled with sadness and grief over what took place. Picture that strong divine essence, that strong feminine force that said, “I’m in and I’m in all the way because I know that God has my back.”

My question for you is what are you being asked to say “yes” to? Is it something within your work? Is it something within your home, within your relationship? Is it a health decision? Is it a change? Is it a transition you've been dreading? What are you being asked to say “yes” to without getting to fully understand it? What are you being asked to say “yes” to with blinders on? What are you being asked to say “yes” to that's on the other side of the mystery, but in order to complete that “yes” you have to walk through the mystery?

All of us on a regular basis encounter these mothers in our life, whether it is the mother that is over-protecting us out of fear, the one that's making us laugh with stories, whether it is the one that's telling us be compassionate and give all you have to give even the shirt off your back, or whether it's the one that says, “You know, I may not be qualified. I may be too young or too old. I may not have very much experience in this, but I know who I am and because of that I will claim this title as mother and I will step boldly into what God has provided for me.”

I want to give you some ways that you can honor motherhood and learn to develop your own inner mother nature. The first one is honor the mothers that have shaped you, not just today. That's one of the biggest reasons I’m never a fan of things like Valentine's Day or Mother's Day or Father's Day or anniversaries. We don't need to be prompted to honor these things. They're beautiful and I do them, but by golly whoever that woman in your life, or maybe for those of you who only had a father figure, for wherever you received that mothering essence, nature, and love, honor that person. You became who you are because of who they are and when I think you guys are pretty dang splendid, so I really hope that you give thanks for those who brought you here.

Number two is it doesn't matter if you have children or not practice spiritual mothering. Practice being that presence for people. You've heard about four different types of mothers here. Practice being someone who nurtures life by seeing people, hearing people, loving people, and meeting them where they're at. Practice being someone who knows how to give a hug and at the same time a swat on the butt that says, “You better watch out. Next time you might not be as lucky.” Practice being able to see that face that just told you everything that they've done wrong and they're not sure what to do from here, and still say, “I love you. Take my hand. We're gonna get through this.”

The other one is make sure that your inner child has received the mothering it needs. I was playing a game on my phone, sometimes it's what I do when I just want something mindless to do, and one of the ads in between was talking about childhood trauma, childhood trauma, childhood trauma, and you know, depending on how you measure childhood trauma, I bet we've all had childhood trauma. And we can put it on one end of the scale to the other end of the scale. Whatever you want to call it, some of us may still be sitting with a wound that's still festering after who knows how many years because as a child we didn't receive something that we believed we needed.

But I want to challenge you to know that every moment is perfect and though it may have looked like a struggle, though it may have hurt, though it may have shaped you in ways you never wanted to be shaped, the thing is it's behind you now. And if you can't see that, then talk to someone about it. Where you are and who you are is beautiful, glorious, and perfect. If you see yourself you would see that you are the image of God. So, that is my third one, to know that if your inner child needs a mother's love, needs healing, it's in there, but if you're having a hard time finding it on your own, then seek someone talk to. They could be your pastor or a friend. Talk to a mother that you look up to and honor and love, but talk to someone.

And last but not least, make sure you take the time to celebrate the motherly wisdom that resides in each one of us. I know sometimes, especially of an older generation, it's hard to believe the feminine wisdom, the motherly wisdom, is within you, especially if you’re a man. You may think, “I’m a man. I don't have those things in me.” But the truth is, in the completeness of who we are, we all have a sacred masculine father and we all have a divine feminine mother living in each of us, so take the time to celebrate that side of you. I was a daddy's girl so I know what it's like to have a man who I viewed as strong and brave, but also as compassionate and loving and soft and snuggly.

As I come to this conclusion I just want to share with you happy Mother's Day. Recognize that mothers are a gift from God and, for those of us who did not have the opportunity to have whatever storybook mother you're envisioning, know that that storybook mother resides in you. All that you need, all that you are becoming, all that God sees you as is present here and now. Happy Mother's Day.

Please join me in prayer. Our most gracious and loving God, we give you so much thanks for the father/mother God that you are in our life, yesterday, today, and always. We give you so much thanks that we know that in times of protection, in times of fear, in times of silliness, in times of getting ready to accept new challenges that we have your Spirit guiding us and leading us and empowering us just like a mother's loving hand. And so, God, as we are in this place, receiving your word, help us to hear the message that we need. Help us to receive the guidance and the empowerment that we need to step into this world, showing all the love and compassion and nurturing that we can to mothers, to fathers, to children, to grandparents, to everyone we run into. God, we are grateful. In Jesus name, amen.